Just a Can of Hairspray

I download sermons by Chuck Swindoll to listen to on my iPod. I have the greatest privledge in hearing him every Sunday at church, but I enjoy listening to some of his other sermons. Getting Through the Tough Stuff is his latest series and so I listened to one on “confrontation”. Do I have friends of comfort or character? Do I have friends that tell me when I’m out of line and help to shape my character?

Over these past few weeks, I’ve really been examining my friendships. I have friends from all all aspects of my life. My closest friend has known me since junior high school. And I’m proud to say that we still make time to spend with each other even though we live over an hour apart and both keep a busy life. She has seen me through my hardest time, and I have seen her through as well. I value her friendship greatly, and while she is married, is a homeowner and is more ’settled’ than me as a result, we still have commonalities. Did I mention that we lived together out of college and still remain friends! We will be friends for life.

My friends since then can be what I call fair-weathered. I took having a loyal friend for granted. I just figured that everyone is like my friend Debster. I am wanting to find a couple of really good friends. Those that aren’t there some days and then there only when they need you. I need to start picking my friends like I pick dates. I don’t just date anyone. So why be friend with just anyone? It’s not that I can’t have acquaintances! But I need to be a better judge of character when choosing friends and allow myself to let a friendship pass if it isn’t a good match.

My simple prayer request is to find a couple girls that want a new friend! And not just any friend, but a friend of character.

This has been a difficult week. A week full of “God, where are you?” Of course, I know he is there, but with the craziness and saddness that has happened within one week, how much more can a country continue to take?

As the country still mourns the events of April 19: Branch Davidian Compound in Waco and more importantly, the OKC federal building bombing and then April 20 remembering Colombine, now this. The massacre at Virginia Tech on Monday. Then the man who at Johnson’s Space Center took a man and woman hostage and killed the man and himself. And lastly, the Navy’s Blue Angel who died during an Air Show Saturday. It’s been one tough week. And the dealth of a Navy pilot, just hits too close to comfort for me.
And while sometimes I may question, “Are you there, God?” He never sits back and thinks, “I wonder what is going on down there?” This is my Father’s world. Oh let me never forget. That though the wrong seems oft so strong, God is the ruler yet.

Amazing words by an amazing band…The Goo Goo Dolls…”Better Days”

And you ask me what I want this year
And I try to make this kind and clear
Just a chance that maybe we’ll find better days
Cuz I don’t need boxes wrapped in strings
And desire and love and empty things
Just a chance that maybe we’ll find better days

So take these words
And sing out loud
Cuz everyone is forgiven now
Cuz tonight’s the night the world begins again

And it’s someplace simple where we could live
And something only you can give
And thats faith and trust and peace while we’re alive
And the one poor child that saved this world
And there’s 10 million more who probably could
If we all just stopped and said a prayer for them

I wish everyone was loved tonight
And somehow stop this endless fight
Just a chance that maybe we’ll find better days

Yes…I know. It’s been a while.

I am in my new apartment. It’s quiet. I don’t hear construction. I sometimes hear my neighbors in the morning as their bathroom is right next to mine. Not a problem. It’s quiet. Did I mention that no one is walking above me? No high heels! No dogs running around! I’m on the top floor! YAY! I don’t hear construction in the morning. It’s quiet. And it’s big. Well, big for me.

I am cooking more. I like my kitchen here. Eating out gets old and gross. It’s not good for us. It’s just not. When I cook, I cook healthy.

The Mavs are up by 9. Go Boys. I’m glad Dirk is able to play tonight. Make that 12. Dirk just made a 3 pointer. Go Dirkie boy!

Mom, Dad and I went to visit my grandparents today. It was a good, but short visit. They can’t tolerate guests for too long. So we got up early, parents picked me up, and off we went to Burnet. We got home around 6. I never get to see them enough. They live only 4 hours away, but it’s a day trip when I go. If it’s overnight, it’s with an Austin friend of mine or just drive back that day. It was good to exchange Christmas gifts with them and talk with them for a while.

Tomorrow my brother and his girlfriend are coming in town. That should be fun! I haven’t seen him in a while. I always like to see him, even if we do fight. It’s all in good fun. Well, not really fun, but we still love each other after it is over with!

Well, Merry Christmas. MERRY CHRISTMAS! Did you hear me?! MERRY CHRISTMAS. Not Happy Holidays. MERRY CHRISTMAS!

Today I am reminded at how much one action can effect many. How one choice can change the course for so many others. And today I am reminded that no one is immune to the work of sin. No matter who you are, what you do and how high of pedestal others may place you on.

It’s sick.

It’s disappointing.

Unfortunately, it’s life.

It’s affected so many churches and affected mine back in May. It has now affected my parents’ church. It’s disappointing. And while I have an internal conflict that says, “Everyone is human,” I have the other side that reminds me that those called according to His purpose should take a higher road. It’s sad. Disheartening. Discombobulating.

I guess the sermon at my church was rathering fitting today. A reminder that I have more in common with non-Christians than I remember. We all pay rent/mortgages. Pay car payments. Get up and go to work. Yet the only difference is that they are a victim of the enemy. They aren’t the enemy.

Sometimes God doesn’t make sense. Sometimes he allows for disappointment. It’s all the more a reminder at how much the enemy is at work at those called according to His purpose.

God, you know my feelings here
Could wipe my world away,
Ravaging the promises
A stronger heart once made,
So hold me, I’m falling so fast,
And tell me that the fighting inside will pass
As I walk away,
And find the strength to choose
The man who waits for me
With a heart that’s true.
Oh, faithless heart,
Be far away from me.
Playing games inside my head
That only I can see.
Oh, faithless heart,
You tempt me to the core,
But you can’t have a hold on me,
So don’t come around anymore. - Amy Grant